May 24, 1996:
I became homeless today. Now before you quickly click
the back button in an attempt to avoid some woe-is-me story, read on.
You just may be surprised.
The clock approached 10PM when I got home. I gathered
my belongings and work I brought home and got out of my car. A
voice called out from the darkness as I headed inside. "I'm sorry
if I startled you", it said as I turned around to see a police
officer. After I told him my name he told me my apartment had been
damaged by a fire.
I will tell you this, it is unnerving to be met by the
police when you come home any time, let alone late at night. When they
ask your name, where you have been, and more questions you begin to lose
it. After they tell you a fire damaged your apartment, you don't hear he
questions any more, you just want to rush in to see the damage.
I fumbled with the keys in my earnest quest to get
inside. I thought is was positive that the door was still there --- and
locked! I became somewhat depressed as the police office shined his
flashlight and I looked around. You all know the thoughts that run
through your head at such times, "why me!?" No different with
me.
The fire started in the apartment below mine. The fire
pretty much destroyed it and what the fire didn't get the water from the
fire hoses did. The place can be rebuilt but the family that lived there
will be relocated to a temporary home. They lost a lot. Not much will be
salvageable. The man who lived next to them, also homeless now, had
quite a bit of damage to his bedroom and lost most of things there, but
nothing that is too valuable.
In my place the fire destroyed the bathroom as the
fire raced past on its way to crashing through the roof two stories up.
The family in the apartment above mine is also homeless. The spare
bedroom I use as an office has holes in the floor and ceiling
revealing mind shaft type tunnel from the basement through the
roof. The kitchen, that
shared a wall with the bathroom, will need some work to get it back into
useable shape.
As I looked around to my surprise, and much to my
relief, from what I could see from the flashlight, the damage seem
light. With the exception of some smoke damage, and lots of debris
scattered about, it looked like I lucked out. I did see I couldn't stay
there, though. I still didn't really know what I lost. Taking inventory
would have to wait for the morning light. I knew I had lots to do. I
felt like just running away. I didn't. I gathered a few items and headed
out to the motel that would be my home for awhile.
I got to the motel the apartment managers arranged for
me after 11PM. I was the last one from the apartment building to check
in. They gave me my key, a toiletry kit, numbers for the Red Cross
and Salvation Army, and a voucher for dinner at a local restaurant. I
wasn't in the mood to eat and I went to bed.
May 25:
As 7:00 AM struck today I headed back to my apartment
to survey the damage in the light of day. As I saw last night, the damage
for me was nothing compared to the damage and loss my neighbors had. I
opened all the windows to help get to stench out, took a deep breath,
and began the task of getting my life back together and back on
schedule. I gathered a selection of clothes I would need for the next
couple of weeks and threw them in the wash to rid them of the smoky
smell. Next, I picked up some trash that blocked m path to my office,
walked in, and started to sort through the mess.
When I looked at the damage I was amazed that I didn't
suffer more of a loss. In my office, many boxes loaded with books had sat
right on the spot where a hole gives me a view of the apartment below.
There was some smoke damage but nothing of real value was lost with the
exception of bathroom type stuff, a few papers, and some computer discs
(I do not have any idea what stories of mine they held), and some dishes
and the like in the kitchen. The firemen got things moved quickly and
did a sensational job not only fighting the fire, but protecting my
property -- books, printer, computer, and all my office paraphernalia --
my life!.
Now, I am generally optimistic all the time, but, I
know that had I lost more I don't think I would be sitting here in a
motel room on a Memorial Day weekend writing down my thoughts and ideas
of the event. I would probably wander around, find a place to sit,
gather my thoughts, then head to the Red Cross for some help. But, then
again, maybe I wouldn't do that. Maybe I would still be me. I like the
thought of that.
You see, as a writer I have to write. Not only is it
what I do, in many ways is is therapy for me, and a way for me to put
things in perspective. And, even if the apartment building had been
completely destroyed, I would have not lost all. I would still have the
clothes on my back, friends I could call upon for help, and the
incessant desire not to let the bastards win, not to let fate fire its
best shot without me hitting back.
There were holes in the floor reveling the apartment
below, holes in the walls where cabinets used to be, and trash and
debris everywhere. As I started to clean things up I had to make
decisions along the way. I created four areas to pile things, one for
personal items, bills, and correspondences, one for work related items,
one for my writing life, and one for trash. The last pile was the
biggest.
In my pack-rat existence I accumulated many items,
magazines, newspaper clippings, and junk there was no reason to hold on
to now. Talk about getting motivation to "clean house" and to
get on with Spring Cleaning - A fire is about as good motivation
as there is.
I placed each of the three groups of items I would
keep in plastic bags. I would sort them later back at my motel room.
After placing the bags in the car I went back to the office to pick up
the remaining trash, replied boxes, dust things off, and clean all I
could.
I cleaned the living room and then washed the dishes.
(I should have done that several days ago. Talk about being embarrassed.
I wonder what the firemen thought of the "slob that lives
here.") After cleaning the counters and the micro-wave, I stored
things where they belong (as best as I could. After all, I just had a
fire here). I started to feel better. I had taken control of a
very bad situation and was making the best of it. Also, I did it
quickly!
By 10AM to my surprise and delight, the
restoration company came by and began the process of rebuilding the
place. They took all the fire debris out of the bathroom, kitchen, and
office, moved all my things out of my office into my bedroom, tore up
the carpet, and washed the ceilings and walls down and began to get the smoky
smell out.
Before I left I took one last look around, opened two
windows that were still closed, and smiled as I thought of a couple of
jokes. The morning of the fire I had just opened a new bar of soap. (The
letters on the bar weren't even rubbed off yet.) I also opened a new
bottle of shampoo and put a new roll of toilet paper out. Now they were
all gone! What a waste!
Also, do you remember when your mother said,
"Don't forget to put clean underwear on. You never know when you
are going to get hit by a car." Well, here is some more advise.
Never leave in the morning without doing the dishes and throwing out
last Sunday's papers and cleaning the toilet. You never know when there
will be a fire and you don't want to be embarrassed when the fire
department gets there.
______________________________
Epilog:
On May 24, 1996 there were many fires in the United
States. Some people died and others were left homeless. All have to
begin the process of rebuilding their lives, one step at a time. One, a
writer from New Hampshire whose total belief in the power of the human
spirit to overcome such tragedies, is one of them. His loss may not be
as great as others, but, the rebuilding process is still the same. To
beat fate one has to begin quickly and step assuredly. We can grieve
over the loss, but as soon as we ask, "why me?", we lose.
"You can't let the bastards win!"
Four weeks after the fire I left the motel and moved
back home, in time to celebrate the 4th of July! The
fireworks are launched in a large field next to the apartment complex. I watched
the glorious display with a friend from my balcony standing there with a
bottle of champagne and an open
umbrella. I'm not taking any chances with them falling embers!
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