I killed a pigeon today.
Does that shock you? You may be thinking, why would anyone kill a poor,
helpless, cute, little pigeon? What a monster I must be! Well, before
you call the SPCA and Pigeon Lovers of America, let me explain. You see,
it really wasn't my fault!
I was driving down the interstate around
a bend in the road that kind of goes up a hill as the road turns, and
then quickly back down. Just as I got to the top, less than a couple of
hundred feet ahead of me were several pigeons smack dab in the middle of
the road.
I was traveling at highway speeds and I
was on top of them (literally) in half a heart beat. They were very
happy being right where they were and they didn't move an inch. I
swerved to another lane hoping the thud I heard was a pot hole or rut in
the road. As I looked in the rear view mirror I saw feathers flying in
the air, pigeons scrambling for cover, and one lost soul tumbling to the
side of the road. My happy morning wasn't so happy any more and I felt
bad about killing the bird.
All day that bird has been on my mind. I
have been rationalizing about it, too. I know it wouldn't bother me it I
had hit a sea gull or crow, and, I would be looking for a metal if I had
hit a buzzard. But, if I had hit a hawk, I'd be feeling worse
than I do now. I'm not sure why that is. I have seen a myriad of road
kills along the side of the highway and it has never bothered me. Of
course, it wasn't me that killed any of them!
I do know that it's sadder to see a
raccoon on the side of the road than it is to see a possum. I don't want
to even talk about cats or dogs. Unless you are Granny Clampet, you
probably care more for a raccoon than you do for a possum. Seeing a dead
squirrel may not bother you. I'll be willing to bet, though, that seeing
a dead chipmunk would.
There has to be answers for these
questions and I proposed them to some friends. They felt my forehead,
smelled my breath, and took all the sharp objects with them when they
left. They learned long ago to just leave me alone when I get into these
moods.
There may be sociologists that disagree
with me, but, I believe we are all products of our environment and
culture. Our character and lives are shaped by the people we meet, the
experiences we have, and the things we come in contact with. That is the
reason it takes time to adjust when you move to or visit a new place. It
takes time to get accustomed to the stimuli at work there.
If that really is true, where in
my past did this pigeon stimulus hit me!? I understand why I rooting for
the Americans, and Canadians during the Olympics, but, why do I care
about a pigeon!? One friend told me, "you're the writer, figure it
out." If by being a writer I am supposed to be able to figure such
things out, I'm going to look for a new profession because I am doomed
to fail.
What were those birds doing on the
highway? Were they lost and just stop to check their maps? Why weren't
they in the park by the popcorn man and hot-dog vendors doing pigeon
type things, like dancing on the heads of statues and whitewashing the
sidewalk!?
There are a lot of things I do not
understand. I can't explain why sunsets are better than sunrises. I wish
I could tell you why there are more blue things in my life than any
other color. There are a couple of things I do know, though. Today I
have been thinking too much and I've got a headache, and I am sorry I
hit that bird.
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