I received an email from a former colleague a few
days ago with a link to a job. The person wanted my opinion of the
company and feelings about the job. The position is within my former
field of Material Management that I had worked in for many
years and my former cohort trusts my opinion.
The position sent to me was interesting and had I
still been in manufacturing and wanted to make a move to a new job, I
would consider it, I think -- that is it could be interesting and all
except for one thing -- for the product.
Believe me when I tell you the company is wonderful
and working for it would be terrific --- except for the product they
make --- as needed and necessary that it is by half the population.
Um, this company makes
bras.
Now let me tell you I believe it is important to like your job. I also
think it is also important to like the products you make. You need
to have a feel for them. You should
understand them and be able to get your hands around them (so to speak).
Now, I may know what the product is, and I may know
how it is used (though, the why sometimes eludes me), but I have had
absolutely no luck nor success with the intimacies of them.
This could be a part of the list of reasons why
there were not many third dates in my life. Girls and women have very
little patience and tolerance for guys without a least a smidgen of
manual finger dexterity and they can’t at all deal with those who are totally
inept.
It really isn't that I am
that inept, you see, but the problem I have with bras is with their
fasteners, clamps and whatnot. Unfastening a bra never was as easy as
peeling a banana, that believe it or not I became quite good at and did
so with ease, in order to get to the delectable fruit that lay
waiting within. It required too much manual finger dexterity of which I
have a limited supply. That is why I am not a piano player or
safecracker and why I still hunt and peck on the computer keyboard.
Bra buttons would have helped, but not much. Even
though I button shirts often, I still didn’t have an easy time with
girls and women’s skirts with buttons. I mean, between the
uncooperative finger problem , nervousness, and . . . well, you get the
picture.
Zippers would be best. I never had problems with
skirts with zippers. But then, I use a zipper 5 or 6 times a day so I
have a little more experience with them. (Don’t even think about going
there with the little jokes!) I don’t know how women would like bras
with zippers, though.
Of course if anyone had asked me I would have
suggested a VELCRO® approach. (Though, we would have to do something
about the noise issue. We don’t want to disturb people in the movie
theatre or wake up parents or roommates.)
I am not sure making bras is for me. The whole
thing is a puzzle to me. Did you know that 75% of all women wear the
wrong size? I read that on
the company’s web site. My questions are, first, how do they know? Did
they tape measure the whole female half of the species or set up road
blocks and do random bra checks? And second, why? It seems to me that if
75% of your customers are using your product wrong, we have an Enron
level failure to communicate, here. Someone in the PR or marketing
groups doesn’t have his hands around the situation and bras aren’t
the only things getting padding. I couldn’t handle knowing 75% of my
customers use my product wrong.
Also, can someone explain to me why, as a part of
the bra purchasing decision, prettiness comes in to play? “Oh, it’s
so pretty! I just have to have it.” Then, as a part of the normal
dressing routine it just gets covered up and no one sees it. For whatever the reason, one cannot walk down the street wearing
only a bra on their upper torso, though strolling down the avenue with a
string bikini top is OK. I just don’t get it!
And, a new “pretty” bra is not something you
normally take out to show the girls (or guys) at work during lunch or at
school for show-and-tell. For the record ladies, guys really don’t
care how pretty a bra is, only about quick-release, I don’t care what any of
them told you. And somehow padded bras must be covered under false
advertising laws some place.
I don’t get it. And if I don’t get it, it
ain’t for me. Anyway, I am sure you are aware by now that my
dating-life cups are not running over lately nor are the cups of
subjects to write about. If they were, I wouldn’t spend 800 words
writing about bras, a subject in which I have no desire or intent to
become an expert.
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